So, i have lost my foreskin ...

To most, this would not be a big issue, but to me? Yes, it is a massive change in my lifestyle. I will take you back to the original issue, how things have unfolded over the last few years, and how I have had to have it removed now.

Around four years back, I had a few friends around at my home, and as it was a warm sunny day, we all had a lot of alcohol during the afternoon, so we were all drunk. It got to early evening and i suggested for food that i fired up the BBQ and everyone agreed. Well, that was the beginning of where we are today. Doing anything while drunk isn't good, but to use a BBQ was just stupid. I fired it up, we raided the fridge, and I began to cook burgers and sausages. Everything was going great, and I started to serve food in burger buns. I was still drinking, so I placed more burgers on the grill. I turned away and was chatting to the others, and then after a few seconds felt a sharp pain on my penis - I had managed to place my foreskin on the hot housing of the BBQ when I turned. I have no idea how long it was on there as being that drunk, I did not register what was happening immediately.

I jumped backwards, clutching my penis, and went upstairs into the bathroom and turned the shower on cold and ran water over my foreskin. The others turned off the BBQ and came up to check on me. It looked white in the end and hurt a lot. I kept the water flowing for a good hour on it, and afterwards, it did not hurt too much. I took paracetamol, covered in Vasoline, and continued with the evening. The next day the foreskin had closed up, but i could still pee ok so just kept putting vasaline on and did not give it much thought. I did this for nearly a week, but by this time, it was becoming more difficult to pee as the foreskin was closed so tightly it was becoming an issue. I built up the courage and went to A+E.

After a few embarrassing moments at the check-in, I was quickly seen by a nurse and then had the urology team come rushing down. They were very concerned and suggested an emergency circumcision. I should have agreed to it then but instead talked them into leaving it on. Still, they said I would be back within a couple of years to have it removed, and then the next day, I had to go to East Grinstead Hospital Burns Clinic. I again had to explain to them what had happend and they said i was doing all that could be doen currently. They said it might be possible to do a skin graft, but it was unlikely to end well, so I went home and emailed them weekly pictures until they were happy it was healing.

After six weeks, it had begun to open up again, and I could nearly roll it over the head of the penis. I was advised to buy a phimosis kit, and for the next 18 months, I used this to stretch open the foreskin slowly, and it worked to a point. I found that it would only go so far and had to find new items to stretch it open. I located different pieces of plastic tubes, and this is eventually where it went wrong. I had gottten it to state where i could roll it over the penis head easily but when erect it was ticht to do so and tight on hte shaft. I left it for about a year with no stretching, and I found recently it was closing up again and was tight to roll back even when flaccid. So i decided last week to pop the tube back in whihc i had not used ofr a year. It was tight and challenging to stretch the foreskin over it, but I managed it. The tube had a ring around the middle, and what I usually did was roll it over the ring but not over the end of the tube so that it was possible to remove it after an hour; well, it decided to go over the end of the tube, and I could not seem to roll it back over so as I was late for work I left it in there. That made it a lot worse. At the end of the first day it was swollen and i relised i had no chance of getting it back over. In hindsight, I may have been able to use teaspoon handles to stretch it over, but I did not think of this at the time and left it in there. By the end of the following day, it was now so swollen I could barely get inside the foreskin. I worked with cutters to try to cut the tube in half, but where the space was so difficult to get in as the foreskin had swollen too much and to admit defeat. The following day, I went to A+E, and after examining it, said there were two options - a dorsal slit or a full circumcision. After we discussed this, the doctor said," If you were in your 80s, then yeah, stretching it every few months soul be ok, but as you are 50, you are young, and it is crazy to think you can do that for the rest of your life" i agreed it had to go. So I was taken onto the ward and was set for removal under local anaesthetic at 2 pm.

The time came, and I was taken to the theatre. Then, as he put the first needle in the base of my shaft, I had a major panic attack. I thought i would be sick, i was shaking and paniciking. We all decided i needed to go under a general anesthtic instead as there was no way i could be awake for he precdure. I was knocked out and then woke up on the ward at 4.15 pm, minus my foreskin.

So, how does this affect my life? The answer is in a big way. Most people would not have any idea that I was a model/participant for the use of my foreskin in a particular way, as it was so impressive. I am not saying any more than that as to what as it was not naturist-related and is now just history, but I will say that I had been doing that all my life and had travelled abroad for events, photo and video shoots, and now that part is all over as I have no foreskin. So I used to have two lifestyles - the naturist one and the other model type one, but now I am solely naturist, so this is a huge lifestyle change. Over the last few years, there has been so much of a change that I filled two black sacks with equipment and devices related to the other now-defunct lifestyle.

As to the future? Well, I only have my natural lifestyle to focus on, and this brings me so much joy and happiness that it will keep me going and focused. Yes, I miss my foreskin, and as yet, due to the swelling have no idea how my penis will look, but to be honest, I don't care! Us as natursits dont body shame and i feel that regardless of how it looks now peopl will still like me for who i am. I know I will lose some followers who were purely following me as I had a foreskin, and that is their shallow right to unfollow me, but at the end of the day, I am still Nick - The FLying Natursit; I am still alive and kicking and being a naturist keeps me strong and this won't change.

At the start of the healing process. Saturday was the day it was done; I had no pain, which turns out was due to the amount of anaesthetic in me still. I could pee fine and was released around 8.15 pm and went home. Later that evening, I needed a number two, so I sat on the toilet and had to strain a little, which in turn then made my panis start steadily dripping blood into the toilet. I panicked, but it stopped within a couple of minutes after standing up. I slept an hour at night, woke for 10 minutes, slept an hour, etc. I was so tired the next day but had to deal with how swollen I was and that I had to take paracetamol to dull the tenderness. It was not too bad, but it was still backwards. I had to text my manager, and we agreed I should stay off work for a few days.

Monday came, and I had managed to sleep all night, but being a typical male, I had woken up to a morning erection - that was a tad uncomfortable, lol. The rest of the day was not too bad, besides having to pull back the swollen skin that was partly over the end so I could clean it and apply cream. All in all, it was not a bad day.

Today is Tuesday, and I am pretty much the same other than I do keep getting the odd sharp pain at the rear of the penis head, which I think is the stitches just pressing on parts there that are tender. I will repeat the cleaning and cream application today and see how it goes. I need to pop out to the pharmacy to collect a new asthma pump, which will be an adventure. Other than that, it will be more lying down and resting so it can heal. Passing urine is ok, other than I have to learn how to control it now, as when you have a foreskin, the stream is just a steady flow; now it is more like a snake firing venom out in a fork shape ... or sometimes back on itself.

So that is it so far as to why and how healing proceeds. I hope it has given an insight into how we should not drink and BBQ as sausages will get burnt, how we all have to admit defeat and deal with the embarrassment of hospitals, and finally, that I am still me and have not changed.